It’s confirmed – I’m 39% moron.
Kasia April 13th, 2007
The Canuck posted this Moron Test on his blog. Apparently he is 39% moron. I’m not sure what it says about me that I’ve been dating a 39% moron for 3 1/2 years… 
Anyway, I asked him to send it to me, which he did. Thanks, sweetie! 
Here it is – if it tickles your fancy to do so, copy and paste the questions off of here, fill in the appropriate X’s (deleting mine first, of course), and multiply your final score by 3.
[X] I have walked into a glass or screen door. [Clam note - I walked into the SAME screen door repeatedly during one memorable vacation to the U.P. However, it doesn't say I have to increase my score for having done so more than once...and I did have too many wine coolers that weekend...]
[ ] I have tripped on my shoelaces and fallen on my face.
[X] I have choked on my own spit. [Gross, but true.]
[ ] I’ve seen ‘The Matrix’ a bunch of times and still don’t get it. [Saw it once, or maybe twice. Totally get it. Also think it's totally lame.]
[ I type only with my pointer fingers.
[ ] I have accidentally caught something on fire. [No - all my fires have been wholly intentional.]
[ ] I’ve told a cop to piss off and gotten screwed for it. [Who's actually that stupid? Don't people know cops carry guns?]
[ ] I attempted to sip out of a straw but it accidentally went into my nose rather than my mouth. [Not that I remember...]
[X] Sometimes when I think of something funny I laugh out loud and people look at me weird. [All the time - the first time I remember doing so was in ninth grade.]
[ ] I’ve caught myself drooling. [Does drooling while sleeping count? ...I'm going to say no...]
[ ] I’ve accidentally caused an explosion. [No, only because I had very careful chemistry lab partners and I know myself too well to apply for a job in a nuclear power plant.]
[ ] If someone says the word ‘fart’, I can’t help but laugh.
[X] I’ve turned into a ‘do not enter’ one way road plenty of times. [In fairness, that's very common here in Detroit. When I went to England, my European friends laughed at me for looking both ways to cross a one-way street. They had literally never seen anyone go the wrong way up a one-way street. Apparently they weren't in Belgium when I was...]
[X] Sometimes I just stop thinking and zone out … [If that's grounds for being a moron, I'm really in trouble.]
[ ] It is POSSIBLE to lick your own elbow.
[ ] I just tried to lick my elbow.
[ ] People often shake their heads and walk away from me.
[X] People often tell me to use my ‘inside voice’. [Generally just The Big Seester, but that's enough...]
[X] Gum has fallen out of my mouth while talking. [Again, gross but true.]
[X] I’ve used my fingers to do simple math. [I'm not sure it was actually necessary rather than to illustrate a point, but I've done it.]
[ ] I’ve jumped off a moving vehicle.
[ ] I ate a bug for $5 or less. [If someone paid me more than $5 to eat a bug, which one of us would be the moron?]
[X] I’m taking this test when I should be doing something more important. [Shouldn't we all be doing something more important?]
[ ] I repost chain letters because I’m afraid of what they threaten will happen if I don’t.
[X] I’ve done something really stupid when I was drunk. [See question above about walking into screen doors. Other than that, the only really stupid thing I've done drunk that I can remember was actually getting drunk.]
[ ] I’ve run into a golf cart tire when I was drunk.
[ ] I’ve searched all over the place for something and then realized it was in my hand the whole time. [Not that I remember, but it's usually in the most logical possible place...]
[X] I accidentally break a lot of things. [Tell me about the rabbits, George...]
[ ] My friends know not to use big words around me. [Definitely not.]
[ ] My friends like me because I’m fun to laugh at. [Could be, but they've never said as much...bless their hearts...]
[X] I move my head to the side when I’m confused. [Again, primarily for illustrative purposes, but yes.]
[X] Sometimes I start telling a story and then forget what I’m talking about. [Too often to admit to.]
[ ] I’ve fallen out of my chair before. [Not that I remember offhand...]
[ ] When I’m laying in bed I sometimes stare at the ceiling and try to find pictures and words in the texture.
This is an exceptionally hilarious blog test. Thanks for sharing! I think the commentary on each answer really added to it, as well.